The Worst of Christmas

I am grinchy. I make no bones about that, and I even “celebrated” December 1st by changing my MS Teams picture to the Grinch. It was hard to find a picture in which he wasn’t looking happy. I don’t need to remind myself about how terrible the 2018 version of The Grinch was either, but that comes to mind.

So here’s the worst Christmas songs:

Paul McCartney: Wonderful Christmastime. This used to be my least favorite song. Not just Christmas, but everything. The worst Beatle. The worst of his terrible writing.

NewSong: Christmas Shoes. I know everyone hates on Christmas Shoes and there’s a good reason for that. It’s garbage. Pure and simple emotional manipulation.

Traditional: Twelve Days of Christmas (with exceptions for versions featuring Straight No Chaser and The Muppets.) We get it. You have a bird fetish. Gross. Who is going to clean up after this?

I was going to put Mariah Carey’s version of All I Want for Christmas on here, but I have to admit she has some undeniable talent as a performer even if she cannot hit high notes anymore. We all say you lipsync on New Years Eve a few years ago Mariah.

The WORST OF THE BUNCH: Taylor Swift: Christmas Tree Farm. This would be ok if it were written and performed by a 7 year old. I hate Kanye West but I can cut him some slack for interrupting this song full of “these lyrics are dumb, but they need to rhyme” schlock. I would rather listen to any other song because at least they put in the effort. I put in more effort to write papers when I had screwed around playing games or whatever and started writing it the night before. GAH. Just no. I would rather watch the 2018 The Grinch than hear this again. There is just no excuse for this.

I guarantee I will have heard all of these in the next 4 hours.